Introduction to Recovery
We at RML follow Recovery as a Lifestyle that is based on a more expanded idea than "just don't drink or drug". We believe that the actions we are taking, the addiction or even compulsions we are caught in are just the "tip of the iceberg".
The so called "problem, compulsion, or addiction" is the symptom we are manifesting - and a deeper meaning is behind the behavior. We are eventually just on "automatic". We act out without reason, without knowing why and eventually it becomes a way of life that is destuctive to ourselves and the people around us.
We understand that finding out "why", and then integrating those part of ourselves that are "at odds" can lead to becoming a person that makes conscious decisions, good choices and lives a functioning, healthy life. For instance, just changing the "self talk" that goes on inside each of us as a constant dialog can change many aspects of our lives. That self talk is the result of what you believe about yourself, and with it, you are constantly affirming that belief. Regardless of whether it is positive or negative, it shows on the outside, in our actions and ultimately as how we handle life and it's challenges.
You may hear people say that it doesn't matter why we do what we do, but we believe that it does. Does this mean years and years go by, in therapy? No, it means that realize it and then just change it. There may be no incredible breakthrough trauma why you react the way you do. It may be something as simple as changing your mind as to how you think about yourself. Likely, we are not even conscious of the reasons why, and finding out that "why" whether a simple thought process or something more traumatic, is the step to changing the behavior that has manifested from the original reason. When the light bulb goes on and you finally understand what the reason or reasoning has been behind a compulsion, we experience our "aha" moment and can change our reactions to life. We can heal the hurt and move on.
Family of origin is very influential. When we were "apprentice people", we were soaking in all the things around us to learn how we would behave and react. Our experiences formed the basis of how we thought about things and how we reacted to them. This began to form our personality.
How many times do you hear people say "Well, that's how I was raised"...usually when it is something that they perceive to be a good thing. Of course, we can "blame" it on how we were raised too...but understanding that it is a "reason why" and not turning it into something or someone to blame is key to healing and changing. And, we can all change, once we understand.
Our early thoughts and perceptions are though, individual and we need to take responsiblity for them as adults. We need to make sure that in raising our own children, we take care to not "make the same mistakes", and even though we don't want to, most of the time, people end up doing it anyway.
So in our world of Recovery, what we want to do is "rewrite the script"...of our lives, so the "acting out" is different, and the results are different than they have been. Otherwise, we continue to "circle the airport", stuck in a certain pattern, continuing to repeat the same mistakes sometimes in different and varied ways, but they all stem from the same source. Our belief about ourselves and our reactions to the world around us.
The so called "problem, compulsion, or addiction" is the symptom we are manifesting - and a deeper meaning is behind the behavior. We are eventually just on "automatic". We act out without reason, without knowing why and eventually it becomes a way of life that is destuctive to ourselves and the people around us.
We understand that finding out "why", and then integrating those part of ourselves that are "at odds" can lead to becoming a person that makes conscious decisions, good choices and lives a functioning, healthy life. For instance, just changing the "self talk" that goes on inside each of us as a constant dialog can change many aspects of our lives. That self talk is the result of what you believe about yourself, and with it, you are constantly affirming that belief. Regardless of whether it is positive or negative, it shows on the outside, in our actions and ultimately as how we handle life and it's challenges.
You may hear people say that it doesn't matter why we do what we do, but we believe that it does. Does this mean years and years go by, in therapy? No, it means that realize it and then just change it. There may be no incredible breakthrough trauma why you react the way you do. It may be something as simple as changing your mind as to how you think about yourself. Likely, we are not even conscious of the reasons why, and finding out that "why" whether a simple thought process or something more traumatic, is the step to changing the behavior that has manifested from the original reason. When the light bulb goes on and you finally understand what the reason or reasoning has been behind a compulsion, we experience our "aha" moment and can change our reactions to life. We can heal the hurt and move on.
Family of origin is very influential. When we were "apprentice people", we were soaking in all the things around us to learn how we would behave and react. Our experiences formed the basis of how we thought about things and how we reacted to them. This began to form our personality.
How many times do you hear people say "Well, that's how I was raised"...usually when it is something that they perceive to be a good thing. Of course, we can "blame" it on how we were raised too...but understanding that it is a "reason why" and not turning it into something or someone to blame is key to healing and changing. And, we can all change, once we understand.
Our early thoughts and perceptions are though, individual and we need to take responsiblity for them as adults. We need to make sure that in raising our own children, we take care to not "make the same mistakes", and even though we don't want to, most of the time, people end up doing it anyway.
So in our world of Recovery, what we want to do is "rewrite the script"...of our lives, so the "acting out" is different, and the results are different than they have been. Otherwise, we continue to "circle the airport", stuck in a certain pattern, continuing to repeat the same mistakes sometimes in different and varied ways, but they all stem from the same source. Our belief about ourselves and our reactions to the world around us.
Different psychologists, for instance, Dr. Wayne Dyer, have boiled why we do what we do to sometimes, a very simple idea. Everything is an attitude. Even two people raised in the exact same home as siblings, experiencing the same upbringing can turn out to be totally different from one another. This is the result, again, of what we believe about ourselves.
Changing what we believe about ourselves starts within and can be a life alteriing experience that can leave you a happier more productive, self actualized person.
Regardless of what happens in our lives, we have a choice as to how we react to it. The choice is ours and ours alone.
Changing what we believe about ourselves starts within and can be a life alteriing experience that can leave you a happier more productive, self actualized person.
Regardless of what happens in our lives, we have a choice as to how we react to it. The choice is ours and ours alone.
How many times have you seen a person, or even said to yourself, "I'm never going to be like that", and then you became exactly what you said you disliked?
As we said, life is a matter of getting out of the old patterns of behavior and stopping the tradition of passing on that behavior to those around us, including our children and those who interact with us in our lives.
Learned behavior, belief systems, ways of coping by medicating ourselves with drink, drugs, shopping or whatever you can think of becomes automatic. To stop the cycle, we find out why and then proceed to change the pattern.
Yes, we believe you can be happy, healthy, whole and we can stop the behavior and patterns that are destroying our lives.
Its a journey to enjoy and opens up a whole new world!
Happy Recovery!
As we said, life is a matter of getting out of the old patterns of behavior and stopping the tradition of passing on that behavior to those around us, including our children and those who interact with us in our lives.
Learned behavior, belief systems, ways of coping by medicating ourselves with drink, drugs, shopping or whatever you can think of becomes automatic. To stop the cycle, we find out why and then proceed to change the pattern.
Yes, we believe you can be happy, healthy, whole and we can stop the behavior and patterns that are destroying our lives.
Its a journey to enjoy and opens up a whole new world!
Happy Recovery!
